When you’re coaching yourself, the tone of your coaching self-talk is as important as the words you use.

Even with encouraging words, a harsh, critical tone can increase your stress and hurt your performance.

  • To see how this works, stand in front of a mirror, look at yourself, scowl, and yell “Relax!” How does that feel?
  • Then, look in the mirror, smile, and in a soft, soothing voice, say, “Relax.” How did that feel?

To be the coach you want to be to yourself, practice your coaching self-talk in front of a mirror.

  • Start by speaking to yourself at a normal volume with a relaxed, soothing, and confident look on your face.
  • After a minute or two, switch to whispering the coaching self-talk to yourself with that same relaxed, soothing, and confident look.
  • Last, switch to just thinking about coaching self-talk as you look at yourself in the mirror with that relaxed and confident look.

Practice this every day, particularly before a practice or game, a quiz or test, or any performance.

Stress Less: A Teen’s Guide to a Calm Chill Life

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